Three thoughts:
Personal development often feels like climbing a mountain, the steepness creates difficulty and intensity but eventually you arrive at an outlook, and you can embrace a clear view. Finally, you see how much progress you have made, even if you have further still to go. You are not the same person anymore, the one who started the journey is gone and a new you has arrived. There is a strength and vibrancy that more easily flows from the revitalized connection that you now have between your mind and heart. You feel aligned. And not just with your authenticity, but with a clearer mission of how you want to show up in the world. You no longer feel like a foreigner in your mind; you are familiar with the ups and downs of your emotional history. You can now look at your past and see lessons instead of feeling the sting of old hurt. This is no small victory. To release the pain that once clouded your thoughts and interactions and to replace that heaviness with the lightness of presence is heroic work. You accepted the challenge of growing and now you get to enjoy the rewards of your investment. You realized the truth, that no one can give you the feeling of freedom the way you yourself can, and you decided to act on it. You feel new, the world looks new, and even though this may feel a little daunting, you know you are up for the challenge of living a new life because you have your recent experience of embracing your power.
Preventative communication can help stop unnecessary arguments in a relationship. When you take the time to let your partner know where you are in your emotional spectrum (meaning if you feel down, sad, happy, short tempered, etc.) it helps you both have the information you need to support each other well that day. You don’t always need to be asked “how do you feel today?” In fact, volunteering the information, especially when you are going through turbulent emotions, can be so helpful to the both of you. It helps you admit to yourself what emotions are currently passing through you and it helps your partner know when you are going through a tough moment. This level of communication can uplift self-awareness and help cut down on projecting your turbulent emotions onto your partner. Creating a culture of communication between the two of you will not only welcome in vulnerability but it will also help you remain flexible in the ways you show each other loving support. What you need one day may be quite different from the next. It is important to not expect your partner to read your mind, they simply can’t do that. Real love is about finding a middle path that you both feel good about.
Once you realize that the judgments of other people are largely formed by their own personal emotional history combined with their current emotion, it will give you even more freedom to genuinely be yourself. The most common state of perception is an unclear one, because our old conditioning is evaluating everything we encounter. People normally see you through the very thick lens of their own past. Letting our lives be defined by the valuations/judgments that others place on us, is a quick path to people pleasing and constant dissatisfaction. If you want to do your life justice, then you need to simply be kind, walk gently, have compassion, but above all, live in a way that honors your truth. It is possible to view others without judgment, to see them through a lens of acceptance, but that takes intentional practice and healing work to relieve yourself of the thickness of ego. If ego is more predominant in your mind than compassion, then it will be hard to see anything other than yourself. Fortunately, compassion is like any other muscle, as you train it, it will become stronger. Existing from a place of compassion instead of ego is not only possible, it is necessary to have a more harmonious life.
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Journal Prompt:
Can you describe a time that you were able to look at someone through the lens of compassion? Are you comfortable with letting people close to you know how you feel? Lately, have you been living in a way that honors your truth? What is your current relationship with people pleasing?
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I’ve arrived at a major transition in my life and I’ve been asking the universe for guidance and it arrived in your note about personal development. Many Many Thanks your words are exactly what I needed to hear. So grateful for your shares 🙏🏽