Power, Love, and "Doing The Work"
Three thoughts:
The real masterclass is observing your own mind so that your emotional history no longer stunts your relationships or life goals. You can learn a lot from other people, but revolutionary internal change comes from building your self-awareness to the point where it becomes easier to make good decisions that make your present and future brighter. Allow yourself to be inspired by others, but remember that the deepest transformations occur when you become more familiar with the patterns that impact your behavior. Too often, we get stuck listening to the stories of other people in the hope of it effortlessly changing ourselves when what would truly serve us best is turning our attention inward. If you want to heal the dynamic between you and yourself, then you need to have the courage to explore the conditioning that shapes your perception. Whenever you find yourself thinking that another person has all the answers and validation you are looking for, you are actually devaluing your power. Love, freedom, and wisdom are seeds that sprout from within – remind yourself of this truth whenever your ego tries to tell you otherwise. There is nothing wrong with having a teacher and making time for learning, but at the end of the day your healing and maturity is elevated by building the type of self-awareness that helps you internalize these lessons and change your actions.
The phrase “not doing the work” has become a vague way to put people down. What “the work” means could vary widely depending on who you talk to. No one has a monopoly on how this phrase is actually defined. Since there is no unity on what “the work” refers to, it becomes quite easy to develop your own measurement system that is then unfairly projected onto others. If a person does not do things the way you like them to be done, then the ego can easily jump in and perceive them negatively. The ego has this insidious way of weaponizing something as good as personal development. It is always trying to rank what it sees and place it into a hierarchy. Ego is at work when you are reveling in condescending thoughts about another person. It is critical to remember that your ego wants other people to think and act just like you. Ego is known for its inflexibility and lack of appreciation of differences in views and opinions. The ego likes to hold its views as primary and all else as unpleasant and inferior. One way to combat the ego and its craving for hierarchy is to cultivate compassion. The mind is a series of patterns and every action that we unconsciously or intentionally make impacts those patterns. If we find our mind rolling in illogical and unnecessary negativity about another person, we can aim our attention into compassion and reframe the way we are examining the situation.
Embracing the ups and downs of relationships is one of the best ways to build harmony. Our attachment to fun, excitement, and perfection can lead us into the unreasonable idea that a relationship should be continuously pleasant. The reality is that human beings cannot constantly sustain such high energy levels, if we tried to, we would either fall into performative and untruthful behavior or we would burn out and crash. Like the seasons, we also go through phases, and this directly impacts how we show up. Especially when a relationship is open to growth, there may be times when one of you is moving through and unloading old hurt/trauma or in need of a slowing down period for proper integration of new wisdom. When two people can appreciate that moods vary and calmly communicate the reality of the moment they are in, it becomes easier to step up for each other and provide loving support. There is an element of selflessness in relationships that actually supports the union in becoming more vibrant and gives both people the sensation of fulfillment. The key part is taking turns in the giving and receiving of support so that both feel heard, nourished, and properly loved.
Big Price Drop: 36% off Clarity & Connection
Clarity & Connection is 36% off the original price.
Usually, a sale like this is temporary. I wish I could tell you when it will be over, but I don’t control the online prices.
You can get a copy of Clarity & Connection through Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Bookshop, Book Depository for international orders, and at your local bookstore.
My first book Inward is currently 20% off the original price.
Journal Prompt:
How have you been living in your power lately? Where are you with your healing/personal growth right now? How do you handle when your ego gets caught in a loop of negativity towards another person? Have you been intentional about embracing the ups and downs of life lately?
Links:
Clarity & Connection USA (36% off the original price)
Clarity & Connection Barnes & Noble
Clarity & Connection Local Bookstores
Inward (20% off the original price)