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Three thoughts:
The fastest thing that can squander a beautiful connection is attachment, meaning the craving to have things occur in very particular way. Often, attachment is exacerbated by fears that stem from our unhealed emotional history. Tumultuous and unobserved emotions snowball into insecurities which strengthen the misguided idea that pursuing our attachments is the only way to create safety and abundance in our lives. Our hurt tricks us into thinking that our only way to keep love is to cling to it. Insecurity will manifest itself as control, which blocks the flow of real love. The truth is that only open hands can carry love well; hands that are closed tightly cannot receive or give love. Love’s closest synonym is freedom, which means that love is not something that can thrive in a constricted environment. Love needs space to stretch, expand, and flow. A common fear is that without the constraints of attachments and expectations love will never be able to last. Love between two people does require a middle ground where both can meet, but attachments cannot provide this space because they are far too rigid. Healthy love creates its middle ground through calm communication and voluntary commitments. Commitments are mutually agreed upon actions and ways of being that both partners feel good about. Commitments work because they are simultaneously sturdy and flexible. When each person decides that their needs or wants have shifted, they can also shift how they show up for each other in the relationship. Harmonious partners align their commitments with their growth and with clear ways to support each other’s happiness.
Confusion comes from being disconnected from your intuition. Learning how to go along with what feels right, not in the sense of following your cravings, but in the sense of moving in the direction of what supports your evolution and your highest good, is a necessary skill to learn. There are two critical things to understand about intuition. One is that it doesn’t care about your comfort zone. It will ask you to be bold and brave even if you do not feel ready. Just like love, intuition is also a vehicle for growth. If you listen to it, it will help elevate you to new personal heights, but to get there you will have to face the heaviness that is weighing you down so you can fully let it go. The second is that it may ask you to place yourself in difficult situations where you have to face your fears, but it’ll never ask you to hurt yourself. Your intuition will ask you to be courageous, but it will not ask you to be reckless. Attuning yourself to your intuition is a personal process. For me, intuition feels like a calm knowing that appears in the body. If I don’t listen to it the first time it will reappear sporadically with tranquil certainty. Intuition has a softness to it, even when it asks you to make bold moves. Intuition is quite different from the reactive rambles of the mind or moments of emotional turbulence – both of these often carry tension whereas intuition flows with important information that can help you.
Our society glorifies speed, big leaps forward, and meteoric rises, but reality usually moves at a slower pace, especially when it comes to personal transformation. Every day doesn’t have to be a big win for you to end up in a thriving and beautiful place. Transformation isn’t a smooth process. Cloudy days are bound to happen. Setbacks are natural. Down moments are expected. But in the end, small steps will get you to where you want to go. Evolving into a new you is a slow and intentional process where you have to essentially build the new habits that you need to live a more peaceful and fulfilling life. Teaching your mind to move in a new direction will take repetition and time. Often, it will feel like you are moving against a strong current of old conditioning, but eventually the new you will more easily come forward. Our task as we move into a new way of living is to reorient our idea of success away from fast results and fully embrace small daily accomplishments. This is how we build momentum for the long journey. Remember, happiness is not achieved overnight, peace takes time to build, a healthy mind requires slow and gentle tending.
Big Price Drop: 36% off Clarity & Connection
Clarity & Connection is 36% off the original price.
I wish I could tell you when the sale will be over, but I don’t control the online prices.
You can get a copy of Clarity & Connection through Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Bookshop, Book Depository for international orders, and at your local bookstore.
My first book Inward is currently 20% off the original price.
Journal Prompt:
How do you support freedom in your relationships? What does ideal love look like to you? What does your intuition feel like to you? What small steps are you currently working on taking?
Links:
Clarity & Connection USA (36% off the original price)
Clarity & Connection Barnes & Noble
Clarity & Connection Local Bookstores
Inward (20% off the original price)
In the whirlwind of life it is, some days, much harder to stay grounded and calm. Coming up to 36yo single and not kids, I feel like I can’t escape judgements. The little steps I take are moments for myself to think and implant this certainty of thoughts that, this is my life, it is like no one else. Slowly focusing only on the present without continuing to carry my so heavy past or overthinking the future. Slowly learning to be with myself, in peace. To forgive, accept, surrender and let go of the rest. Learning how to breath and to observe.
I know all this, the practice isn’t that easy. The only commitment to Love I have lately, is to Love myself more.
I have Loved and been Loved in the past and one of the small steps for me is daily letting go of the idea of Loving this man and focusing on the experience and lessons I have learned about myself. Grateful I have known this and thankful it helped shaping me to the me today. Hard work. Some plateau moment, some moments I feel I’m stepping backwards but then I remember it is all part of the transformation, I accept it, breath thought it.
I have a strong believe that, the day I feel I will open myself again and let of the fears, I will meet a person that will enhance my happiness. I have no doubt, none for a second, that this person will be respectful, loving, caring and we will be right for each other. Until then, I will be focusing on finding myself, knowing myself and working on being my happier self.
Intuition for me only feels like making a choice that feels right to me at the time, it’s agreeing with myself while sometimes I’m being guided in a direction. I can’t explain, it just takes me there. Once you’ve agreed, there’s no going back, you cannot come back at yourself angry or with regrets because you have agreed in the first place. Be in peace with your choices, this will help be in peace with yourself and build more trust within you.
Sending much Love to all.
Love, Always
A xx
Hey Friends, if there are topics you would like me to write about let me know here